Saturday, December 14, 2013

acceptance that leads to freedom


I had a thought yesterday as I was doing accounting on a Friday afternoon. I think viewing homosexuality as a pathology that can be changed or managed or diminished can keep people trapped in other issues not necessarily related to homosexuality but that can result from not feeling accepted as a gay person (low self esteem, depression, body image issues, addiction, etc).
In some Facebook groups, a lot of guys will talk about these issues as though they result from having same sex attraction or like they are all part of the disorder of same sex attraction.
If you attach those side issues to your same sex attraction, I can see how it would be difficult to eventually work through them and arrive at a healthier place because the same sex attraction never goes away. It might ebb and flow, but it's always still there.
I feel like once I was able to accept my sexuality as a normal and God given part of me, it freed up emotional energy to work through all my other issues that I thought were all part of struggling with same sex attraction but were actually completely separate issues. Accepting my sexuality freed me from a whole lot of unnecessary struggling that was actually keeping me from doing real work that led to actual results and changes that made me happier and healthier and freed me from the demons of low self esteem, depression, addiction, etc.
This is exactly the opposite of what I thought would happen. I assumed accepting that part of me as something good and healthy and worthy of expression in healthy ways would enslave me. Instead, it ended up freeing me.