Last night I watched the movie Lars and the Real Girl. I. Loved. It. After Kathleen Flake’s talk on the importance of symbolism, I hesitate to explain what I saw in the movie, so that I don’t shut don’t the symbolism or do it a disservice, but I’m going to go ahead and share anyway. If you haven’t seen the movie, go watch it and then reread this after you’ve seen it. A few things I loved about the movie…I love the big and magnanimous spirits of the townspeople, that they are willing to live Lars’ delusion with him. Some are hesitant at first, but those are the ones who probably learned the most. I love how fully they live the delusion, but gracefully and beautifully introduce bits of reality to Lars. They help him live symbolically. Lately, I love the concept of living a symbolic life. Lars’ delusion is just the tip of so much more that lies beneath. It’s a symbol. So many in the town are willing to explore that symbol with Lars, to help him understand himself and, I think, they understand themselves more in the process (Gus).
Of course I love Dagmar, Lars’ doctor. From the beginning she recognizes the importance of letting Lars live out his delusion. Gus, the brother, is more than hesitant to do that but the doctor tells him that the delusion is a communication and that they need to listen to what it’s saying. Maybe not those exact words, but that’s how I remember it. In America (and probably other places too) we seek to eradicate mental and emotional illness (or anything we find uncomfortable) through ignoring it or medication or any of a number of unhealthy coping strategies. It’s there for a reason. Take a walk with it. Sit down with it and get to know it.
All of us are walking around carrying our own delusions; the only difference is that it’s probably not in the form of an anatomically correct doll. We all have our own versions of reality, our roles and games that we play and our perception of things that gets tainted with our own baggage. We call it reality, because to us it is.
I LOVE THIS SHOW-IT IS ONE OF MY FAVORITES
ReplyDeleteSTOP YELLING AT ME
ReplyDeleteThis movie really is awesome. I loved it when Lars' brother says that she (Bianca slash doll slash gf) isn't real and he won't play along. Then the doctor is like, umm, she is real, and she's sitting in the waiting room right now. Our problems are real for us, and we shouldn't have to feel bad when those problems are not real problems for other people, who have their own unique struggles.
ReplyDeleteThe townspeople are so great. It makes it easy to relate to them throughout the movie, and to imagine yourself helping someone else deal with his or her own delusion. Then, hopefully, by the end of the movie, you can begin to relate to (gasp) Lars himself.
Additionally, I really loved that most everyone was so sure they knew what Lars was doing with Bianca. Anatomically correct dolls are, afterall, only made for one purpose. But they were all totally and completely wrong. We have to quit putting terrible motives onto other people's actions.
Jon Jon,
ReplyDeleteWhat a great recommendation. I'd never heard of this movie (maybe because I live in Ohio?) and it was such a treat to watch. Lars made me so sad, but it was so beautiful to watch his family, the townspeople (I loved the church woman who pointed out to other church members how crazy everyone is), and Dagmar work through his delusion with him. I was sick when I watched this, so maybe a bit more emotional, but I loved it...it even made me love everyone...at least for a few minutes. Thanks for the recommendation!